LMN 3-16-15 Lisa’s Morning News

LMN 3-16-15 Lisa’s Morning News

LMN 3-16-15 Lisa’s Morning News

It’s St. Patrick’s Day Eve! Do you lose your dignity tonight or in the morning? It’s also the day to get out and hit those “After the Ides of March” sales.

The terror group Boko Haram has joined forces with ISIS to form a new Supergroup. They could be bigger than Damn Yankees! This is the most insidious merger since Comcast-Time Warner. I can’t imagine it’s a public relations move.

A burglar was killed Saturday when a Tarrant, Alabama resident opened fire on him as the man broke into his home.   A happy ending … unless you’re the burglar.

Chicago aims to be the world’s greenest city on St Patrick’s Day, they’ve dyed the Chicago River green. At least they didn’t have to add too much green.

Hillary blamed her email scandal on the GOP, turns out the person who leaked the emails to the media is Valerie Jarret, senior advisor to President Obama. Jarret says she intends to stay with the White House till the lights go out. Ooh! We can cut the power?

Guys, you’ve been warned.  An Indian bride walked out of her own wedding ceremony after the groom failed to solve a simple math problem. This guy doesn’t know how many problems he has … because math is one of them.

And a few things you need to know …

On this date in 1926, Robert Goddard tested out his first liquid-fueled rocket. As reporters arrived, he admitted that yes, that was a rocket in his front yard and he was happy to see them.

On this date in 1521, the Portuguese navigator Ferdinand Magellan reached the Philippines, where he was killed by natives the following month. Back then, the rules of “Survivor” were much stricter.

Speaking OF “Survivor,” a former producer in in jail for killing his wife while on a beach trip. Now he gets to play the prison version of his game.

Is there another lawsuit on the way for Pharrell Wiliams? Now Marvin Gaye’s family is noting the similarities between Pharrell’s big hit “Happy” and Gaye’s 1965 song “Ain’t That Peculiar.” Hmm… Blurred lines ripped off Gaye and went to number one, Happy apparently did the same and went to number one. Ain’t THAT Peculiar? Maybe we should just release all the old Marvin Gaye songs since everyone seems to like them.

And … Kanye West has figured out that if you’re going to lie about knowing someone, don’t lie about knowing the president. West mentioned Obama calls his home phone, Obama says that’s not true. He hits his pager.

 

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