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LMN 7-20-15 Happy Moon Day!

LMN 7-20-15 Happy Moon Day!

LMN 7-20-15 Happy Moon Day!

Today is the 46th anniversary of the Moon landing! I went to the rocket station once and asked for a ticket to the Moon but the attendant told me “Sorry ma’am, the Moon is full right now.” Hey – you know how a man on the Moon gets a haircut? Eclipse it! The Moon landing was very real; it was at the top of the Moon steps.

A report says that IRS customer service is getting worse. Isn’t that like hearing that Vladimir Putin is getting scarier?

Thanks to researchers at Oregon State University Hatfield’s Marine Science Center, we have something more powerful than kale. It is red marine algae – sound appetizing? How about this? Instead of tasting like seaweed … it tastes like bacon. A vegetable that tastes like bacon! Our long national nightmare is over.

Because of the severe California drought, visitors to L.A. beaches can no longer take showers after swimming in their disgusting water. Water, water everywhere, but not a drop to drink or shower with. You can make Fresca out of the stuff, but that’s about it.

And a few things you need to know …

On this date in 1810, Columbia gained its independence from Spain. I had no idea the sportswear company was ever run by Spain.

How is Caitlyn Jenner’s transition going? Really well. Right now, she’s at the stage where she not only leaves socks on the floor BY the hamper, but she also picks them up.

The CDC put out a warning asking people not to kiss or snuggle with chickens for fear of contracting salmonella. Oh, sure, tell us AFTER the weekend!

And … Disneyland celebrated its 60th anniversary Friday by going retro. They encouraged customers to dress in 1950’s attire, Disneyland went back to issuing those old style tickets, and everybody waited to get on rides for hours before finally giving up and going to Knott’s Berry Farm.

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