March 5, 2015
2:06 am

Lisa Mason in the Morning


Here's some stuff you didn't get to read 2-13-14

by Lisa Mason posted Feb 13 2014 4:45PM
On this date in 1955, Israel acquired 4 of the 7 dead sea scrolls... in exchange for a first-round draft pick and an archeological find to be named later. Had they bought the complete set, they would have come with a beautiful set of steak knives.

In 1633, the Italian astronomer Galileo went on trial for suggesting that the earth went around the sun. The earth testified that she and the sun were just friends.

Skye, a 5-year-old Wire Fox Terrier, was named Best in Show Tuesday night at the 138th Westminster Dog Show in New York. Hey, we were warned that this would happen if we elected Obama again. The terriers HAVE won!
There was another awkward moment at the Westminster Dog Show when an Afghan Hound attacked a Great Dane because he laughed at a cartoon about Mohammed.

You thought DOPING was a problem? Players in Iran's professional women's football league will now be subjected to mandatory gender tests, after four star players were found guilty of not being women. Because if there’s ONE place you want to pretend be female, it’s Iran.

Russian officials at the Sochi Winter Olympics handed out over 100,000 free condoms to athletes. Of course, with those, you don't get a medal for being the fastest. safe sex in Sochi means doing it in a hotel that can actually pass a building inspection. Meanwhile, snowboarder Shaun White fell down and failed to medal in the Sochi games. He really screwed Team USA. I hope he was wearing a condom. The crowds have been dissapojinting at the games… though I did see some people in Sochi with Winter Olympic fever. Of course, they may have been sweating because it's so hot there.

There's not that much difference between the Westminster Dog Show and the Winter Olympics. Although, because of all the problems in Sochi, there's a lot more poop on the floor at the Winter Olympics.

A winter storm spread misery across the Southeast, closing schools and airports, shutting down power, and leaving people stranded in their homes. The National Weather Service says they haven't seen conditions like this since yesterday.
Looks like 1-more person has been displaced by Hurricane Katrina. Former New Orleans Mayor Ray Nagin is heading to prison, convicted of corruption in the wake of the storm.  Nagin’s mad. He sas all the New Orleans jurors who would have voted "not guilty" had been relocated to Houston. The combined counts could bring a sentence as high as 400-years! But Nagan’s still a young man. And I'm sure there are a lot of prisoners that want to be his Valentine.

A shipment containing 5,000 containers of Greek yogurt was supposed to be delivered to the U.S. Olympic team, but the Russian government blocked it because the required paperwork wasn't filled out. It's tough to get yogurt to hold a pen.
A New York couple married for 67 years died just hours apart from each other. she passed away first, which meant he was finally able to get in the last word. C’mon ladies, you know we do this.

Billy Ray Cyrus has released a hip-hop sequel to "Achy Breaky Heart."  . I think I read about this in Revelation – yall better go to a church.

And ... A 40-foot-wide, 30-foot-deep sinkhole that appeared directly underneath the National Corvette Museum in Bowling Green, Kentucky,  has already swallowed up 8-fully restored Corvettes, and is threatening the entire facility. Is it possible that Jay Leno is an evil genius who has now been given the time to perfect his master plan of sucking classic cars through subterranean passages in the Earth right to his garage in L.A.?

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02/13/2014 4:49PM
Here's some stuff you didn't get to read 2-13-14
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