LMN 4-1-14 Now with 5% more awesome!
by Lisa Mason
posted Apr 1 2014 8:05AM
It's now too late to sign up penalty-free for Obamacare for this year AND it's April Fool's Day. Coincidence? Actually yes. Yes it is.
South Korea returned fire into North Korean yesterday after live shells from the North landed in South Korean waters. CNN claims the shells disturbed a possible debris field from Malaysia flight 370.
There’s a new black eye for Malaysian officials. The transcript of the conversations between the Flight 370's cockpit and air traffic control reveal the last communication to be, "Good night Malaysian three seven zero." NOT “All right. Good night” as previously reported. They aren’t saying why they didn’t reveal the real transmission. Whatever may have happened to the Boeing 777, most countries agree Malaysia is either completely hiding something or completely incompetent. Or completely both.
Vladimir Putin has ordered a "partial withdrawal" of Russian troops deployed on the Ukrainian border. Some believe it’s because the US offered him concessions. On the table now; a hot dog, 2 diet cokes and a bag of Funyuns.
Many World War 1 commemorations are being held world-wide starting this August. In France, they’re erecting statues, Germany is lowering flags, the UK is running TV specials and in Russia, they’d like to cordially invite you to World War 3 in Ukraine.
New federal regulations will require that all new cars will come with rear view cameras by 2018. You know, if going backwards is so dangerous, shouldn't President Obama be equipped with a rear view cam?
Vestavia Hills will now allow residents renew car tags at City Hall. Vestavia is the first to help its people avoid the hours-long lines Downtown and in Bessemer. Here’s where it gets ugly; Jefferson County Manager Tony Petelos says Vestavia’s decision won’t make a tangible difference. MEOW! Don’t be such a downer, Tony – you’re running a county that’s so broke it has to run an extension cord across the yard to steal electricity from Shelby County.
And a few things you need to know…
On this date in 1778, a New Orleans businessman, created the dollar symbol. Finally, there was something to put above the four when you hit shift on a keyboard.
The fast-food war between Taco Bell and McDonald's is escalating now that Mickey D’s is offering free coffee with breakfast until mid-April. I made a run for the border yesterday and noticed Taco Bell had thousands of troops massed there. When did Vlad Putin buy a franchise?
Despite questionable reviews and controversy, NOAH was number one at the weekend box office. If you’re not familiar with the book, Noah gathers 2 of every kind of animal in the world. Or, as Chris Christie calls that, "lunch."
Now that gay marriage is legal in Great Britain, Elton John says he plans to marry his longtime partner, David Furnish. I thought they were already married? Anyone who’s been together that long has the right to be equally miserable or with a 50% chance of divorce in my book.
And … A new study says sales of chewing gum have sunk 11% in 4 years! The horror! Gum is an absolutely essential commodity. How else are supermodels going to practice chewing until they retire?