LMN 4-4-14 Now with 5% more royalty
by Lisa Mason
posted Apr 4 2014 8:29AM
They still haven’t found that missing plane. They hope to find it with a boat, but could not find it in a moat. They’ve not looked upon the ground, so it could be hiding way downtown. They have looked up in the air, but they can’t find it ANYwhere!
The Pentagon says they received no warning that a shooting was being planned at Fort Hoot. Really? The NSA knew. Ivan Lopez posted on Facebook that he had lost his “inner peace,” was “full of hatred” and that’d he’d been “claimed by the devil.” Did Lopez not have ONE SINGLE friend on Facebook who saw those posts? Someone who would at the very least respond, “DUDE. You OK?” When we ask ourselves, “what is wrong with the world?” I’m thinking the answer is … US. If you see somebody starting to go off the rails of the crazy train, you try to help. Granted, I’ve got about 20 people on my personal Facebook page who post things similar to Lopez. I was disturbed enough by one post to write and say, “DUDE. You OK?” Turns out the guy was just posting some rap lyrics and laughed at me. I guess I just invalidated my own argument.
Russian President Vladimir Putin's divorce became final this week, officially ending his 30-year marriage. Lyudmila Putin got Ukraine in the settlement. Crimea river.
Former President Bill Clinton says he wouldn't be surprised if we were visited by aliens from space. At least, that's why he SAYS he occasionally locks his office door.
Have you seen that doofy Alan Thicke commercial for some tax-debt resolution company? He says, "As one of those TV dads, I had to teach the kids about handling money." Wow, he had to teach imaginary kids about handling imaginary money. Even though he’s Canadian, this mostly qualifies him to be our president,
And a few things you need to know …
On this date in 1581, Francis Drake completed a circumnavigation of the world. At the time, there were people opposed to circumnavigation and felt it should be a personal choice.
NBC has told Kathy Gifford that she can drink during that morning show she has with the other chick who drinks, but she is not allowed to plug her own brand of wine. I'm assuming it's called, "Guzzle."
A study says that poor sleep can cause a loss of memory and concentration... and something else... SQUIRREL!
A truck carrying 180,000 eggs was stolen from behind a 7 Eleven in Florida. This could leave omelet lovers scrambling! Trying to crack the case, police describe the thieves as armed and high in cholesterol.
And … Queen Elizabeth and Prince Philip met with Pope Francis in the Vatican. The Pope asked the royals* how they felt about same sex marriage and Queen Elizabeth said, "We try to stay out of Charles' and Camilla's affairs." During the visit, Queen Elizabeth gave Pope Francis a large food basket which included a bottle of whiskey and some beer. The Pope is the leader of the world's Roman Catholics, and the Queen is the head of the Church of England. If those two start talking religion, they're going to need that booze.
* “Rooooooaaaaaals. You can call me Queen Bee.”