LMN 4-8-14 Pinging in the rain...
by Lisa Mason
posted Apr 8 2014 8:40AM
Everyone’s going on about how the floods came right after the movie “Noah” opened. Sure, that’s an odd coincidence, but you wanna make it even weirder? The Malaysian plane went missing after Liam Nissans film “Non-stop” opened. AND the big ice storm happened while “Frozen” was number one at the box office. HOLLYWOOD IS CONTROLLING OUR WEATHER! Let’s see, “Captain America” is number one right now so we should look out for Russian spies and spaceships.
U-Conn beat Kentucky to win The NCAA Championship game last night. It was nice when President Obama called both locker-rooms to wish them well, but later he had them audited for ruining his brackets.
Search crews are still scouring part of the Indian Ocean where a Chinese ship first picked up a apir electronic 'pings' from what could be the black boxes of Malaysia Flight 370. It's nice to see the Brits, Aussies and the USA cooperating with the Chinese on this. Another case of ping-ping diplomacy. Only problem is, searchers really need a third “ping” to pinpoint what is either the missing plane OR a pod of dolphins with a sick sense of humor. Sadly, there have been no further “pings,” leading officials to believe the Black Box aboard Flight 370 has died. C’mon plane, give us a ping. One ping only!
And a few things you need to know …
On this date in 1766, the first patent was granted for a fire escape. How nobody thought of escaping from a fire before that is beyond me.
Weather forecasters say they've discovered a new tool that make their forecasting correct 50% of the time. It's called "a coin."
Just as was foretold in the Book of Revelation; Snookie says she is pregnant with her second child.
Bill Maher is taking heat for saying, “there is a gay mafia, cross them and you do get whacked." Yes, especially if you make them an offer they can't color-coordinate.
Scientists have developed a new atomic clock that is so hyper-accurate; it won't lose a second for 300 million years. Although, several scientists were radiated by the clock 2 weeks ago trying to move it ahead one hour.
And … The guys who claim to have found the Holy Grail in Northern Spain are shocked officials want the cup to undergo a tough inquisition from other Spanish historians. They said "We knew some people would be a little skeptical, but we didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition!" Well, of course you didn't! NO ONE expects the Spanish Inquisition!