LMN 8-4-14 Ebola? In ATL? Sure it's OK...
by Lisa Mason
posted Aug 4 2014 7:26AM
Atlanta is just ONE lab accident away from actually becoming the set of “Walking Dead.” The CDC says having patients with the deadly ebola virus at Emory University Hospital is perfectly safe. Granted, this is the same CDC that apparently kept their smallpox samples behind the Pringles in the pantry instead of locking them up. The WHO is very concerned about the spread of the deadly virus, though I don’t know why Roger Daltrey is involved with this.
It’s an excuse for news anchors to quote Samuel Taylor Coleridge; Toledo’s water is undrinkable due to toxins in Lake Eire. Toledo: the new Mexico.
This may have been a new record. Israel called for a 7 hour cease fire in Gaza, and then immediately shelled a beachside camp. Israel is condemning Secretary of State John Kerry for condemning their airstrikes, and now some conservatives are condemning the Obama administration for being pro-Hamas. Michelle Obama is unashamedly pro-Hummus.
Both houses of Congress are now on a 5-week vacation. Instead of going to Vegas to gamble, they’re going to gamble and visit Gaza. If you hate the idea of not having Congress to gripe about for the next 5 weeks, you can always watch CSPAN's "Best of Gridlock" marathon.
And a few things you need to know…
The U.S. Coast Guard was founded on this date back in 1790. To their credit, not a single inch of our coast has ever been stolen.
On this date in 1926, the U.S. purchased the Virgin Islands, passing up a cheaper deal on the Floozy Islands.
They're trying to bring back the old game show, "To Tell The Truth." Obviously, no one from congress will be on it.
There's a new website called JustLeak.it, that allows users to send anonymous emails to anyone, and it's already getting 10,000 posts a day! It’s a free service but for $50 they won’t eventually rat you out.
And … A Catholic priest in Poland, who recently performed an exorcism on a teenage girl, says that ever since, he's been receiving taunting texts from Satan. That’s impressive! It’s incredibly expensive to text from the 666 area code.