March 2, 2015
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Lisa Mason's Blog
Lisa Mason's Blog
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LMN 2-19-15 Ewe know it is the Year of the Sheep?
Happy Chinese New Year to you and the Chinese government official currently hacking into my news blog. It’s the Year of...
LMN 12-1-14 Are cyborgs on sale today?
Happy Cyber Monday – my condolences to anyone working retail or tech support this season. Or ever. Only 9 deaths were r...
LMN 9-10-14 The Zombie Game is getting Ray Rice-level crazy
President Obama tonight interrupts your TV shows to layout his plans to fight ISIS. And as long as they don't have access...
LMN 8-27-14 Wine Riot!
Odd happenings in the wake of that earthquake. Napa Valley residents are back at work, encouraging tourists to come, the gas ...
LMN 8-25-14 Why is the wine gone?
Napa Valley residents expect a heavy economic blow thanks to yesterday’s 6.0 mag earthquake. Why? It’ll be easier...
LMN 7-9-14 Trying to avoid another WC headline
Heartbroken Brazil fans are claiming the Germans cheated in yesterday’s World Cup shocker – Germany scored 7 goal...
LMN 4-22-14 G'day mate. We're onto you!
In honor of Earth day today, I'm sending all of my work-related emails straight to my “recycle” folder. Actua...
LMN 2-18-14 Satanists vs Lunatic, we're through the wormhole.
A 19 year old claims to have used Craigslist to kill at least 22 people at the behest of a Satanic cult in Alaska. The nation...
LMN 2-3-14 Time to hit the After Groundhog Sales
An unprecedented security force was in place at last night’s Super Bowl to prevent acts of terrorism. No clue how Seatt...
LMN 1-22-14 Now with more opera jokes
Winter Storm Janus is upon us! It’s dumping snow on places we are not, but it’s freakishly cold here. The City of...
Lisa's Morning News "Now with proof clowns are evil."
All of the childish arguing and incompetence over the Healthcare.gov is ironically making millions of Americans sick. As for ...
Lisa's Morning News "News with physics jokes will go over like a Pb balloon."
Finger pointing continues on Capitol Hell. House speaker John Boehner says he doesn’t have the votes in the house to su...
Lisa's Morning News "I Know What You Did Last Shutdown."
Welcome to Shutdown week 2. There’s no end in sight and Congress is starring down the barrel of an October 17 deadline ...
Lisa's Morning News (9-27-13) It's a little ranty today
As if it wasn’t tough enough already for small businesses, the Obamacare insurance exchanges for small businesses won...
Lisa Mason's Morning News ((-19-13) Talk like a pirate day? Who speaks Somali?
Today is International “Talk Like a Pirate” Day! Let me be the first to say “Huufarkarafkayga waxaa ka buux...
Lisa Mason's Morning News (09-17-13)
I’ve added a handy chart to this morning’s news to preempt everything the MSM is about to start saying about Budd...
Lisa's Morning News (9-13-13) Hurry up offense on news today.
A new survey finds that 8 out of 10 Americans feel that Syria is -- OMS,look! Is that Miley Cyrus on a wrecking ball? Anyway,...
Lisa Mason's Morning News (9-12-13) A lot of talk about fake eggs.
Russia’s Vladimir “Captain Diplomacy” Putin says a US military strike on Syria would result in widespread u...
Lisa Mason's Morning News (9-10-13) The Tale of the 5th Little Girl
President Obama will tonight preempt your shows to talk about retaliatory air strikes for a great atrocity. Finally he’...
Lisa Mason's Morning News (9-3-13) Slow News Day? No, it's Slow Humor Day!
As President Obama now attempts to get Congress to shoulder the blame for striking at Syria or not… Hackers from Syria...
Lisa Mason’s Morning News (8-28-13) Now with 100% more TWERK!
Military strikes are imminent against Syria. Hope we weren’t trying to surprise them with a strike, I don’t even ...
Lisa's Morning News (8-27-13) Nothing to see here...
After viewing the horrific video footage of mass atrocities, President Obama says he's seen enough, there’s proof t...
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